Today -- 2006

I did something today
I haven't done in a long time.
I listened to myself and
tried to forget about you.
I went to the grocery store
and tried to pass myself off
as a real, functioning human being.
I flirted with the bag boy.
I thumped watermelons.
I studied lettuce,
not quite sure what I was
supposed to be looking for exactly.
I gawked at the high price
of soda and cookies.
I gazed at all the ice cream, then
decided I did not need it.
I walked away with my paper towels,
lettuce, juice, and cream cheese, and,
for once, felt what I guess it is to be
a normal person - not looking
over my shoulder, or jumping at
every single noise.
It was nice knowing that today,
if for some reason I died,
it wouldn't be
because of you.